What Kaitlyn Jenner and I Have In Common

cita

Aside from the appendage dangling between our legs – and assuming that Kaitlyn will revert to being a male again once the book is completed, we have something else in common.

We visit the GYN floor to see our doctors.

I need a new blood pressure med. One that is available free from the government, but requires the approval of a medical specialist to write the scrip.

His office is in the Ginecologia floor  and his office is labeled as such. I got an appointment about a month ago and paid my first visit.

I had been warned that before I could see the doc, a file needed to be started at the hospital where his office was located. We arrived a few minutes before the 8 a.m. appointment. 90 minutes later I was with a clerk who took my vitals – and then some. He wanted to know if I was married, but not to whom; he wanted my parent’s name, my age, but not date of birth; did I go to college; and was I working.

I saw the doc – needing one scrip for one med. I came out with four scrips for four meds, an order for a complete urine test, and order for an EKG, and order for a chest Xray, and order for a complete blood workup.

The socialized medicine program in Costa Rica is in bad shape financially. I think we got a clue why.

One last “only-in-Costa-Rica” moment. It’s a one year wait for an EKG, but I have to go back in August before they will give me an appointment.

Costa Rica Real Estate Scam? Or Stupid Tax?

stupidtax

Dave Ramsey is a talk-radio financial adviser that I used to listen too faithfully when in the Old Country. He has a saying regarding spending money and losing it… he calls it Stupid Tax.

In Costa Rica, I’ve paid stupid tax because of my own ignorance. It may have happened again… OR I may be the victim of a Costa Rica Real Estate Scam perpetrated by surveyors, or as they call themselves here: topographers.

The guy that owns the lot next to ours discovered that our common property line had some problems. He paid to have the lot re-surveyed to resolve the issue. Things when pretty smoothly and we were both satisfied. I got a new plano – the legal description of the property.

Planno_Complete

Last week I learned that the map shown in the center of the plano is out-of-date and our plano has “expired.” It still is registered with the property government agency, no problem there.

The problem is that the surveyor/topographer didn’t tell me that I had one year to update the registry to reflect the new map illustration. I missed the deadline by three years. I had a document in my hands with all the required stamps. Looked very official to me.

I remedy the situation, I must pay the surveyor $200 USD to print out a new plano and get all three tax stamps to make it all kosher. Plus I must pay a lawyer $100 to file the revised plano with the government.

$300.

Because nobody told me of this requirement.

Scam or Stupid Tax? Either way, I’m out $300.

 

Our “Doctor” Makes Housecalls AND Mows Our Grass

Mazote

Mario is our gardener. Today he told me about a popular natural remedy for a sour stomach – or refreshing drink – that is common among the Ticos.

It’s called mozote… good for the gut! And we need all the gut help we can get.

… mozote – a mucilaginous plant* – is also highly beneficial for intestinal health. It’s like an emollient for your insides! The locals make a drink from it and enjoy it regularly to maintain intestinal health!

Making mozote

Mario chopped off a couple of small branches from a small Guacimo tree. Other websites suggest different names for the plant used to make mozote… but Pura Vida… in Guacimo de Atenas, it’s gonna be branches from the Guacimo tree.

He then took his knife to shave the bark from the branch. Once he had eight strips of bark he took them to a nearby rock and used another smaller rock to smash the shavings. He emphasized that it should be a small tree.

The idea is to put the shavings in a large container, add water, and refrigerate. He said to wash my hands and massage the shavings. After a few squeezes the water turned into a thick liquid.  Others say use the branches themselves after the bark is removed.

After refrigeration, Mario said a few hours – others say overnight,  pour the concoction into a bottle – making sure I don’t get any “trash” into the bottle and ENJOY.

“Enjoy” is not a word I would use… it’s totally tasteless! I guess adding some fruit juice or a little sugar would make it refreshing…

On the other hand, tasteless would be a good thing if using mozote as a natural remedy for stomach upset.

 

 

 

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