Yup, that’s us, just skeletons of our former selves waiting to fall apart into a heap of bones so they can push us into a pit.

I’m going to need a knee replacement sometime the orthopedist tells me.

My favorite TV doctor: Dr. Sanjay Gupta say they have a new knee on the market:

But she was surprised when her doctor, Steven Haas, told her he would give her a high-performance kind of knee that moves and feels more like a natural one.

All right! High performance, that’s what I’m talkin’ about.

As compared to standard replacements, this new knee is narrower around the kneecap. Made of special ceramic, it’s designed to be easier to bend and rotate. “We need to shape the implants like the natural bones are shaped, and that means shaping the female knee to fit the female anatomy and shaping the male knees to have male anatomy.”

I’m able to live a normal (for a fat old guy) life now by getting injections of Synvisc, which is Hyaluronan (also called hyaluronic acid or hyaluronate) is a non-sulfated glycosaminoglycan in the convenient non-aerosol spray injector. (I just made that last part up.)

I’m hoping I  can put off getting a new knee for a long time, but if I get one, I want the high performance model with flames on the side and lots of chrome.