Silly Me, I Thought Gluten Free Meant a Small Ass

Since the asteroid hit the other Earth, we can all resume our normal paranoid activity of wondering what will kill us. Here’s something to munch on, the disease du jour.

…people everywhere are being diagnosed with a lifelong, incurable illness known as celiac sprue disease. This disease poses serious, life-altering problems: it completely changes the way a person eats, drinks, cooks, and lives.

…current numbers, however, indicate that one out of every 150 people has celiac sprue disease. In addition, those diagnosed have to avoid far more than just flour (an extremely unfriendly ingredient for celiacs).

Attention restaurant owners: new niche market!
celiac.JPG
I know here in Kentucky this would go over like a Subtle Butt at a pig roast.

fartpad.jpg Click image for video demo (2 minutes)

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11 Responses to “Silly Me, I Thought Gluten Free Meant a Small Ass”


  1. Gravatar Icon 1 Gretchen
    Actually, one of Ben’s cronies has celiac disease, and I have a friend whose little kids have it. It’s like a wheat allergy, and if you don’t avoid wheat, you get repulsive intestinal symptoms I won’t detail here. But yeah, it’s real. Kind of a new-wave type disease, but real.

    I can see where they wouldn’t put up with that type of California shit in the South, though. :)

  2. Gravatar Icon 2 goinglikesixty
    @Gretchen: I didn’t want to come across like I was putting down the disease. I have Restless Legs Syndrome after all, and with all the ads, don’t think there isn’t a lot of mumbling about that. Same with Chronic Fatigue (I don’t have that, I have Chronic Lazy.)

    I can’t imagine living with that - doesn’t everything have gluten?

    Did you watch video? Your boys will love it.

  3. Gravatar Icon 3 Gretchen
    No, not at all! I remember when I first heard about it I thought God, what a crock of shit. I have also been known to dismiss all Ben’s allergies as imaginary, and I’m still not really convinced they’re not, you know?

    Ben’s mom, as well as an Internet friend of mine, both have Restless Legs. Although I think maybe Ben’s mom uses it as an excuse to kick the crap out of Ben’s stepfather at nights.

    I totally, totally suffer from chronic lazy. It’s like Mike Meyers said in Wayne’s World: “Once I thought I had mono for a year, but it turned out I was just really bored.”

  4. Gravatar Icon 4 goinglikesixty
    Allergies? Got those too. Until Flonase. Miracle drug. If I were Ben, I would go to an allergist and get the preliminary scratch test. They have 12 families of allergens that they inject just under the skin.
    Then I would come home and wave it in your face and say SEEEEEEEE.
    You are really suffering from Chronic Working Mom of Young Kids.
  5. Gravatar Icon 5 The Absurdist
    Okay. Did anyone else think the guy’s underwear was huge? I hate tighty whities. WEAR BOXERS!!! They are so much sexier.
  6. Gravatar Icon 6 goinglikesixty
    @The Absurdist: I’m a boxer briefs man myself. I like my boys close. Commando on the weekends occasionally during the summer. Peek-a-boo.
  7. Gravatar Icon 7 Jacob Sanchez
    No way, I think Tighty whities are the best, I’m in grade 8 and actually, tighty whities are sexier then boxer shorts. Even though I get a lot of wedgies at school because I wear them to gym class, I don’y care if anyone sees me in them..
  8. Gravatar Icon 8 Jacob Sanchez
    Just the other day, A cool kid saw me in my tighty whities at school in the change room. after I changed into my gym clothes, my class was playing dudge ball whn the cool kid the saw my tighty whities pantsed me in front of my whole class. Everone saw the shape of my penis in my tighty whities because I had a really short shirt.
  9. Gravatar Icon 9 Jacob Sanchez
    Does anyone else have a tighty whitie embarrassing story.
  10. Gravatar Icon 10 goinglikesixty
    Jacob? AKA “Dirty?”
  11. Gravatar Icon 11 Nancy
    It’s obvious that 60 doesn’t go to the gluten-free section at Kroger. (It’s nowhere near the ice cream and candy aisle!) LOL

    Nancy’s last blog post..Admin Bar Everywhere

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