Monthly Archive for July, 2009

Page 5 of 8

Geeky Animated Gif Monday: Dead People Edition

imagestrippin

Doesn’t seem right that Billy Mays isn’t included.

What Are Old People Thinking?

Thanks to What the Hell Are Young People Thinking?
what-old-people-think-about1

Days Like These I Just Get Overwhelmed

  • Sofi at the ballpark last night

sofiballpark

Overwhelming, I tell you, overwhelming. At least I don’t feel

Why Senior Citizen Discounts are Bad Business.


Senior citizen discounts are bad for business for a number of reasons:

  • everybody does it.

I’m not talking about the Florida eat-at-4-pm deal. I  understand how that make sense. Get the codgers in early and get them out early so the Xers with ankle-biters can move in and destroy the place.  No, I’m referring to the standard, everyday, defacto “real” price for Seniors!. . . 10% Off! Mayhaps when we are more senior, we will start shopping harder and actually seek the restaurant/liquor store/car wash that offers. . . 10% Off! As it stands now, we go to Lonestar, Toot’s, Red Lobster, etc. etc.  order what we order and at some point during the meal remember we are Senior Citizens and tell the waiter to deduct our 10% Off!

  • we keep forgetting to ask and nobody volunteers the discount. This happened a lot on vacation in Boston. We would decide to take a tour, pay the price, and at later back at the hotel room, I would read in the tour book or brochure there was a Senior Citizen’s discount.

I guess this is an acquired habit: Just ask wherever we go, whatever we are doing. But would it kill the merchant to offer us a discount when we forget to ask? I have to show I.D. to buy beer at the ballpark. I wouldn’t mine showing an I.D. to get a Senior Citizen’s discount. I would feel good about that 12 year old working at Dairy Queen for having the kindness to give me a discount. I might even forego the sneer when s/he says “there ya go” instead of “thank you.”

  • the Senior Citizen’s discount is usually given to people who were going to be there anyway. Kroger. Kroger has Senior Citizen’s Day the first Wednesday of every month. I guess it’s to get those Social Security check shoppers.

Nancy never shops anywhere but Kroger for groceries. Sometimes she shops on the first Wednesday of the month – and HATES it. She says the place is full of old people who don’t know how to park their cars, can’t maneuver a grocery cart, and pay by check.

  • anybody can get the Senior Discount. At some places the age break is fifty-five! I have been missing out on some deals for years!

Here’s the deal business owners:

Instead of offering $9.99 entrees and skimping on portions to increase your bottom line, just stop giving away your profits to Senior Citizens. We won’t quit coming to Waffle House or Denny’s or McDonald’s or Francois’s House of Crepes & BBQ just because you stopped your discount. We don’t eat out because it’s cheap. We eat out because we are
1. too lazy to cook,
2. are social, or
3. want to look at other people, rather than the droopy eyed dogs begging at our feet.

Other hard goods merchants? Like gifts and oil changes and liquor and golfballs. . . shopping at your establishment is not a price deal, everybody price matches these days. We shop at your place because it’s a selection or service deal. We like the stuff you sell or the way you treat us. We won’t stop coming back if you keep that 10% Senior Citizen’s discount.

Senior Citizen Discounts are bad for business. But as long as it’s offered, I’m taking. I’m also asking for it every place I go.

The irony? About the only business that doesn’t offer a Senior Citizen’s discount is the medical business. Now there’s a deal worth shopping for: 10% Off!. . . MRI’s! Tuesdays Only!

I like this joke.

I went to the Patent Office trying to register some of my inventions. I went to the main desk to sign in and the lady at the desk had a form that had to be filled out. She wrote down my personal info and then asked me what I had invented.

I said, “A folding bottle.”

She said, “Okay. What do you call it?”

“A Fottle.”

“What else do you have?”

“A folding carton.”

“What do you call it?”

“A Farton.”

She sniggered and said, “Those are silly names for products and one of them sounds kind of crude.”

I was so upset by her comment that I grabbed the form and left the office without even telling her about my folding bucket.