Watch Las Vegas boom…
Monthly Archive for May, 2010
Page 4 of 7
If Cheeseboy, a mere lad of 34, can admit it and only get Sixty-plus comments of bafflement, it is time for me to admit what you might have already suspected.
It’s not as big of a deal as Cheeseboy made it.
It’s bigger than Bradiffer’s breakup. Bigger than Branjellina. Bigger than when that strange celeb couple named their kid “Apple”. Bigger than the reissue of the McRib.
Cheeseboy doesn’t own a cell phone. I don’t own a cell phone.
I do not want to own a cell phone.
Trying to use Nancy’s iPhone while on vacation further convinced me I am right in my decision.
Cheeseboy did a nice job of explaining all the rational reasons why I don’t need/want a cell phone:
- cost of operation
- cliches of conversation
- churlish behavior
- child-like envy
- cheesy accessories
Without a doubt the iPhone is the Gold Standard of phones, so it follows that AT&T is the best network because the iPhone is tethered to AT&T.
While sitting on the beach, I thought it would be fun to give Bulbous a call on Nancy’s iPhone.
I could not see anything on the screen! I guess the developers of the iPhone all live in Seattle where the sun never shines – or in SoCal where when it does shine, it is filtered by smog.
“Oh yeah,” Nancy said, “you can hardly ever see the screen when you’re outside.”
Shoved phone back in her beach bag.
I wanted to grab a quick snapshot and didn’t have a camera handy. Because of the glare, it was impossible to frame the picture.
From time to time she took a call from a friend and if we didn’t stop walking or driving, the call would be dropped.
I thought it would be fun if she got a “Law and Order” ringtone because she is such a huge fan.
We couldn’t find one in iTunes.
Frustrating? Ayup.
I’m willing to deal with two remotes to watch television – and the four positions needed on the Direct TV remote.
I have a shade on my laptop that cuts the glare so I can blog and read RSS outside so I have made concessions to use technology.
I have Skype and a Skype phone.
I have a Magic Jack line.
But I understand why “the young people” live and die by their phones. I just can’t figure out how a 34 year old married first grade teacher with two young boys can live without one.
That is it folks. I do not own a cell phone and I doubt if I ever will. Strangely enough, here I am BLOGGING… on an actual COMPUTER! I have no idea how technology hasn’t passed me by.
I think he just was trolling for comments – or a phone for Father’s Day.
Ah, the pleasure of returning home just before a primary election. Of the six messages on the answering machine, five were recorded blather from somebody wanting our vote. I would like to meet the so-called expert that decided that political robot telemarketing is a wonderful way to get votes.
Nancy was so hacked during the last primaries that she wrote a letter to the editor indicating that anybody that robo-pol-telemarketed our house automatically lost her vote.
After deleting the messages without listening, we moved on to the mail – and THIS MADE OUR DAY. And after ten hours on the road, that is not easy. It was a robo-letter from Ed Mills for State Senate…
click to enlarge… Seems Ed Mills is “A Regan Conservative”
I kinda know Ed Mills. He runs a local business and we’ve exchanged phone calls and emails. I ragged on him when he had his daughter robo-call a recorded message to our recording device asking for our vote a couple months ago.
I emailed him he lost two votes. He called to explain:
“I’m just a businessman, I don’t know about politics, I just did what the guys I hired told me to do.”
First of all, he hardly is a businessman. His current job was made possible because his sons needed a CEO. They are techno-nerds and didn’t want to fool with anything close to management. Second, he doesn’t know about politics? Akin to saying, I don’t know anything about Egyptology, but I want you to send me to Cairo. Thirdly, he did what he was told. Nice. Just what we need. A State Senator without original thoughts.
So the “experts” he pays for sage political advice sent out a lame-ass letter with the return address:
A REGAN CONSERVATIVE.
I guess Donald Regan was a conservative, but based on the actual letter, he was referring to Ronald Reagan.
Among the reasons Ed Mills wants our vote:
“We live in the real world and these are real issues that are affecting our families”
This is unacceptable.
Whuck?
He is running for STATE Senate. What goes on in D.C. is kinda outside his realm of influence. If he wrote this convoluted paragraph, he isn’t smart. If he paid someone to write this jibberish, he is dumb.
Wait, this may qualify Ed Mills to be the perfect Kentucky State Senator.
Dear General Mills,
Don’t take that last sentence out of context.
Sincerely,
Sexty
I love Google maps, especially Google Street View.
The Sheffield Mine web site said never to trust a GPS or Google Maps or Mapquest to find their place.
Sure, you can chance it and maybe your GPS is right on, but … maybe not – and if not, you’ll become frustrated and you’ll lose as much as one or more hours of trying to figure out on your own just how you do get to us, so really, it’s best to follow our diretions in the first place.
That was a good enough warning for me and I followed their directions and found the mine with no sweat and with an hour to spare.
I was dropping Nancy off to play in the dirt while I went up the road to play in the water. I had no choice but to use Google Maps to plot my angle of attack.
Since I had my doubts that Google had really send a car to drive this twisty road in the middle of the Great Smoky Mountains National Park, I “drove” the route using Google Street View, especially what looked like tricky turns.
At one point in the real journey, I was sure I had made a wrong turn and was screwed. Until I saw that I was driving through this guys back yard.
Good old Google had truly sent a car to document the main roads inside Smoky Mountain National Park!
I had been there before – virtually by driving via Google Maps Street View! How cool is that?
On our way to our final destination, I trusted the GPS since we were on the beaten path. Except the GPS ended before our destination.
Had it not been for driving to our place at the beach virtually and recognizing this break in the road, I surely would have turned around to ask directions.
Now you might recognize that this break in the road is at the end of a bridge and figure I was a dope because I could just count bridges or something. But in South Carolina near the coast there are bridges EVERYWHERE.
As soon as the GPS said we had arrived (which we had NOT) I pressed onward until I hit this break in the roadway where it changed from smooth asphalt to old asphalt.
Bingo! (Yes, I actually said it) and as we rounded the next corner in the middle of nowhere late Saturday night was the entrance to our destination.
I love you Google Street View.
Just hope SC doesn’t decide to fix the roads and make them all smooth asphalt.
But then… it wouldn’t be my fault… it would be the asphalt.
(You knew that coming, right?)
I submerged my groin while on vakay.
The only tale I can relate to you is the one about submerging my groin in the pool. I have found I am a complete scaredy cat when it comes to swimming in the ocean.
There are too damn many critters that can cause serious damage to my submerged groin if it is in the ocean. There are enough jelly fish laying on the beach to convince me that I don’t really need to submerge my groin in their territory.
Plus fisher-people (what is the non-sexist version of fisherman?) have been regaling each other with stories of giant stingrays that have been sighted, even hooked and landed.
On the other hand, submerging my groin in the pool means sharing with the ankle biters.
They would make great shark chum.
