Monthly Archive for September, 2010

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Investment Tip: Cotton and F Dollars

Our cotton crop is coming it right at the peak of the market. TRA-LA, TRA-LA, TRA-LA!

From CNN this morning…

Cotton prices have nearly doubled this year, hitting a near 15-year high following a chain of events among major Asian cotton producers that has choked off global supply.

And our stash of F Dollars is growing at a steady pace.

First, the cotton crop:
It wasn’t easy getting Nancy to be a cotton-picker. Oh sure it was fun to plant the seeds and watch them grow. And she was busting with pride as her first boll of cotton bloomed with the fluffy whiteness.

But she didn’t start cotton-picking without me laying a serious guilt-trip on her.

It hasn’t rained much this summer (TRA-LA), but last night as we lay in bed, there was just a few raindrops starting to fall.

“Did you harvest the cotton” I asked.

“No.”

I reached to the nightstand and handed her the Big Ass Search and Rescue Double D Flashlight. (BASRDDF)

*sigh*

I put the flashlight back on the nightstand quietly.

“OK, I’ll go cotton-pickin’ “

She returned with our entire yield (to date) in the palm of her hand. She took it to her “knittin’ bitches” group at Panera Bread this morning, and is on her way to her favorite yarn shop and Alpaca factory.

It rained throughout the night and will rain all day today (Hurricane Hermine visits Smallburg, Details at 6:00 from Live in Fear Doppler…

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Were it not for her cotton-pickin’ our crop would have shrunk or possibly been entirely wiped out – at the PEAK OF THE MARKET.

*whew*

F Dollars:
I don’t have a clue why and she isn’t saying, but Nancy is hoarding F dollar bills. I’m pretty sure there is a hidden motive here. I hope she has inside information at the Federal Bureau of Printing Money about the F dollar being discontinued.

Who cares if one of my investments was declared “worthless” today.

Cotton and F Dollars.

So far our banana tree isn’t adding value to our agricultural portfolio. I guess banana trees are Mother Nature’s Ponzi: huge growth for a short time and then it dies.

Wonder how an Alpaca would do with the rest of the menagerie?

Next year: I’m planting some burley for cigars. And then hemp for rope (as far as you know) and soon we will be into the Meth … be still my heart.

TRA-LA, TRA-LA, TRA-LA.

Pacific Sun Cruise Ship Unveils Magic Sliding Furniture

This is pretty cool. Like most disaster videos,  it’s only cool because I’m not involved in it’s creation.

The Pacific Sun ran into a heavy storm 400 miles north of New Zealand, hitting 25-foot-tall waves and 50-knot winds.

No sound. What a pity. I’m sure that can be fixed by the denizens of the  innerwebs. Great band name – turn echo on

Denizens, ens, ens, ens… OF THE Innerwebs, ebs ebs, ebs…

Geeky Animated Gif Monday: Happy Labor Day – Jumping the Grill, ala Jumping the Shark

Geeky Animated Labor Day Gif Monday

Remember our Armed Forces who labor … oh wrong holiday… never mind.

Movie Review: “The American” Starring George Clooney

George Clooney solidified his spot as one of my favorite actors with his somber character in “The American.” His role was a big departure from his normally playful, smirky, lady’s man to a sober, cold, killer.

One would think I would have loved this movie. I didn’t. I would give The American 2 1/2 stars out of four. If some of the character casting and plot lines wouldn’t have been so contrived this could have been a three star or better film.

Clooney is a gunsmith. His clientele is limited and he trying to be killed by the Swedes while he builds a gun from left over Italian car parts.

When I complain that a movie fails because it’s not logical, she always takes me down with “it’s just a movie.”  But I argue back, “but it was a story first.”

Here are the fails.

(SPOILER ALERT)

1. With all the specialized weaponry made and available at any southern gun show, why is it necessary for him to build a weapon from scratch?

2. The assassin he is building the gun for is killer beautiful. Not just attractive or good looking. She is hummana-hummana yummy.

3. George gets his loving from a whore in a tiny mountainside village in Italy. She is gorgeous too. C’mon. If she looked like Kathy Bates, well OK, but… she looked like this…

Violante Placido

Violante Placido

4. The weapon he builds comes from car parts he scrounges from a mechanic in the small Italian village.

5. The local priest fathered a bastard.

6. George falls in love with his whore.

7. He wants her to runaway from his life of murder and gun-building forever.

One thing that seem to be far more realistic than most spy thrillers. When George sees someone trying to kill him, he kills them first and anybody that was a witness. There is no dialogue or tet-a-tet. George gets the drop and bang, they are dead. He shoots people in the back, he shoots them – a lot! He is Raid. Kills ‘em Dead.

I want to go to Castel del Monte, L’Aquila, Abruzzo, Italy – no not looking for Violante – to see a mountain village where every home is attached to each other and the mountain by terraces and sidewalks.

No front yards. No street lights.

Cool.