Dying Can Be Fun! Hosparus? Really?


Smallburg has a new business: Hosparus.

Really? Hospice R Us?

Where people go to blow bubbles before they die.

Dying Woman Blowing Bubbles

Image from Hosparus.org home page

Their website says if you get admitted to Hospice R Us early enough, you can have a great time! Shucks, sounds like a good deal…

If they begin hospice care early, many patients with life-limiting illnesses can still enjoy their favorite pastimes. Hosparus helps people face end-of-life issues with as much care and thought as any other milestone in life – so they can enjoy quality of life as much as possible.

I’m ready to move in today. There are five quality of life indicators that would qualify me to move into a nursing home:

  • ability to toilet myself independently
  • ability to feed myself
  • ability to get out of the recliner
  • ability to balance
  • I forget the last one

Hells bells, I can fake all of those and do quite regularly just to get out of chores.

Hospice R Us? Really? Really?

That’s not too cute a name?

Hosparus has just one hitch: you have to be dying of an incurable illness.

Drat.

One of my favorite poets, Lord Byron was the subject of a painting of life before Hosparus came on the scene.

I think I want to die like Lord Byron. Wonder if Hospice R Us would give me a wreath of cigar leaves to wear? And a sword, I want a sword near my death-bed.

The harp? Not so much.  I’ve spent my whole live harping.

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Comments

Dying Can Be Fun! Hosparus? Really? — 4 Comments

  1. What an awful business name.

    By the way, I think that’s a lyre, not a harp, in the painting, but you may have also spent part of your life as a harping liar.

    I bet you want that sword that your dad used to have. You wrote a post about it once.
    Catch Her in the Wry recently posted…TGI Saturday!My Profile

  2. @Catch Her: I at first thought it was a lute. But lyre is much better – harping liar! Love it.
    sword: we know too much about each other because of our blogs! (you remembered!)