Monthly Archive for January, 2011

Page 4 of 5

Congressional Reform Act 2011

Published on January 8, 2011 in Baby Boomer. 1 Comment Tags: Congressional Reform Act 2011.

Congressional Reform Act of 2011

1. Term Limits: 12 years only, one of the possible options below.
A. Two Six year Senate terms
B. Six Two year House terms
C. One Six year Senate term and three Two Year House terms

2. Members must abide by all laws they impose on the American people.

3. Congress (present & future) participates in Social Security: Full participation in the Social Security system as any ordinary citizen.

4. No Tenure: A congressman collects a salary while in office and receives no pay when they are out of office. Retirement is covered by Social Security or participation in a 401k matching fund or by a contributory private plan.

5. Members of congress are prohibited from government contracts for lobbying or any other purposes for 5 years. Past contracts are voided.

6. Members lose their current health care system and participate in the same health care system as the American people under a revised Health Care Reform Bill.

7. Congress will no longer vote itself pay raises. Congressional pay will rise by the higher of CPI or 3%.

8. Any legislation passed by congress requires a 14 day review period prior to final vote during which time each congressman must read and understand the entire legislation.

9. Legislation will be single issue only with no special interest riders (pork earmarks) attached.

10. All legislation passed will have a specific sunset provision.

If you agree, like ‘em.

UPDATE: (per Bruce’s idea) If you want to sign a petition (can’t vouch for the websites) try these:

http://www.gopetition.com/petition/41920.html

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/25/congressional-reform-act-of-2011/

http://www.petition2congress.com/3944/congressional-reform-act-2011/

Ted Williams, the Man With the Golden Felony Record

Published on January 7, 2011 in Baby Boomer. 3 Comments Tags: Bum, Felony, Golden Voice, hoax, Ted Williams.

Ted Williams, the new hero of the American television media, has a rap sheet – including felonies – that would cause any smart employers to not even let him in the door.

Instead, the crack addled Golden Voice is getting tons of job offers and freebies without trying very hard.

Loser.

I love that finally The Smoking Gun is doing the work that used to fall to mainstream media. They have looked into Ted Williams background, and as one would expect they are finding:

theft
robbery
escape
forgery
drug possession

For twenty years – 20 – the man has been committing hard crimes. He just didn’t fall on hard times recently. Those hard times have come over two decades!

One Columbus, Ohio, businessman (where Williams hung around) told cops that Williams and a woman were “refusing to leave the business property” and had become an “ongoing problem” for the business, according to a police report.

Williams begged customers for money, the woman apparently was turning tricks.

“gets picked up and dropped off in the parking lot by various and numerous males in different vehicles. The management had repeatedly asked the two suspects to stay off the property and have been cussed and yelled at by the suspects for their effort.”

Cops told Williams to cut it out and Williams got pissed off and the man’s business got pissed on – by Ted Williams.

The business owner he has seen Williams stealing items from cars parked by customers at Lowe’s.

“He’s basically been a thief for the past two years,”

What a fraud. What a loser. What a world. The Man With The Golden Felony is now an inspiration for South Florida homeless.

Dennis King, an aspiring economist, is a convicted felon, sleeps on sidewalks near Biscayne Boulevard, and says he has a plan to reduce the deficit and to help Haiti.

“The name of my organization is called ‘World Charities,’”

…he told a television station, pointing to a stack of typed and handwritten documents.

Erick Jones, an aspiring musician who lives on the street near the American Airlines Arena, said he knew Williams’ story well. Jones is looking for a break from a musical talent agent. Hey! Too bad there isn’t a reality teevee show about the homeless musicians!

Even the normally cynical New York Daily News glossed over Ted Williams crime record.

I mentioned that a made-for-teevee-flick was in Ted William’s future.

Nope. It’s been done.

How ironic that the savior in the movie The Soloist was a newspaper columnist. It was a newspaper “reporter” that gave Ted Williams his break. “Reporter” because he apparently didn’t bother to run a back-ground check to see if Williams really deserved a break.

Oh, and The Soloist is about a man who is mentally ill – not a crack, meth, herion addicted loser bum.

C’mon. I was sick of Ted Williams BEFORE I heard his voice. Now it just pisses me off that he is pulling the wool over most people’s eyes.

C’mon!

C’mon already.

You want a story? How about his partially blind wife who raised Ted Williams’ kids – and his druggie girlfriend’s kids too?

Because I Feel the Need to Share

Published on January 7, 2011 in Baby Boomer. 3 Comments Tags: Oliver, poop, Sedona.

You don’t need to know this. You probably don’t want to know this. You won’t be better for knowing after you read it.

This is purely a self-indulgent post because I need to share.

It’s about dogs pooping. (You’re welcome for the lack of visual aids.)

Sedona is a “real dog.” She is a lab-border collie mix. She is 60 pounds, strong, active, feisty, smart, fun. When she needs to go, she will stand at the back door and give me a signal. I open the door, she saunters out into the back yard, spots a spot, sniffs a sniff, squats and poops. Sometimes, I just open the door and she goes out and poops.

Oliver is a “pretend dog.” He is a Shih-Tzu. He is 20 pounds, lazy, needs grooming regularly, lazy, needy, lazy, and lazy. Oliver needs a friggin’ announcement. He never has stood at any door suggesting he would like to poop outside.

Oliver mailbox.

The first time he hears that, he raises his head from his curled up spot on the blanket on his couch.

Oliver MAILBOX you lazy lump of fur.

This usually gets him standing up looking at me as if to say, “you talkin’ to me?”

%$*&^|%^{}] Oliver ^%^^8087% Mailbox!!! %^(*

This will get him to jump down off the couch, stretch and mosey to the front door all the while looking at me as if to question how I know he needs to shit.

We have a leash law. Oliver does not wear a leash. Oliver is too good for a leash. Oliver has a routine:

Walk down drive, pee on car tire, walk to mailbox, sniff bush, pass, sniff mailbox, pee on mailbox.

Oliver! %$# (*&& $_)({|]\%$^ This Way!

This gets him to trot to the corner stop sign. Sniff. Pee. Sniff.

C’mon hurry UP.

Now the true Oliver Poop Routine kicks into another gear. Remember, prior to this, only pee was evacuated.

Walk to side yard, look for place to move from street to yard, move into yard, move back to street, move to different spot in street to cross to yard, move into yard, trot, sniff, hop, circle, circle, hop, sniff, trot, circle, circle, sniff, sniff, trot, trot, trot, circle. Move to different part of yard, circle, circle, sniff, trot, circle, circle, poop.

Oliver and I are a lot alike. The only thing that gets us off the couch is a good shit.

Breathe Easy. First Baby in Smallburg Was From a Woman.

Published on January 6, 2011 in Baby Boomer. 1 Comment Tags: Woman has baby.

For a while we were concerned that the first baby born in Smallburg might have come from a man…

Ted Williams, Man With Golden Voice, Didn’t Try Very Hard

Published on January 5, 2011 in Baby Boomer. 6 Comments Tags: Ted Williams.

Yup, I was as amazed as you the first time I heard the classic FM radio voice come out of Ted Williams scruffy, meth-mouth.

Two thoughts crossed my mind.

1. I hope this isn’t a hoax perpetrated by some radio station. I’m still not convinced this might be the case. The only thing that keeps from yelling “hoooooooooax” is the guy’s meth mouth. But even that can be faked with some good fakery. I’m guessing that since the guy is making television appearances and getting some close scrutiny that he is probably a for real crack-addled bum that got lucky.

2. This guy wasn’t trying very hard to get work. He does voice-over for crying out loud. Pick up a damn phone! Here are the offers he has since being “discovered”:

interest from Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert
voiceover work at Quicken Loans Arena
NFL is also hot on the tails of Williams’ voice to see if he is interested in doing voiceover work for the NFL Films division.

“I really, really want to get this guy in a seat for an audition,” Kevin McLoughlin, NFL Films’ director of post production, told the Daily News. “When I first heard about it, I was like, ‘Good voices are a dime a dozen.’ When the voice hit me (on video clip), I said, ‘I’ve got to get this guy an audition. This guy deserves a second chance.’”

The Ohio Credit Union League offered a $10,000 opportunity to do voice-over work for the Ohio Credit Union League, pending a background check. He also was offered a house.
MTV: Someone claiming to be from MTV called into “The Morning Zoo” to say that they’d love to work with Williams.
ESPN: has expressed interest in Williams, too.
Radio: A Pennsylvania radio station is apparently interested in Williams.
Giving back: The television station WBNS-TV wants to use Williams as a narrator for One Day To End Homelessness, a telethon planned for Jan. 31.

When you have the “golden voice” like Ted Williams has, it can’t be that tough to find some voice work – even in Columbus, Ohio. And you know, a couple phone calls to some voice agents in Los Angeles would have gotten this guy work in a heartbeat.

He really wasn’t trying very hard. And don’t whine about his crack-addled brain on drugs being fried. The guy sounds pretty damn lucid in the interviews. He knows who Susan Boyle is, fer cryin’ out loud. He’s been sober for 2 1/2 years!

C’mon!

This kind of story makes me sad for all the plain-Janes and Joe Schmoes that are standing on the street corners begging like Ted Williams and incurring the wrath of passers-by.

It makes me sad for those people that standing in line for minimum-wage jobs with no benefits while drawing unemployment benefits that probably will end soon.

Ted Williams has set back the work ethic of every down-and-out schlub in America. Luckily, they don’t have access to any media and don’t have a clue that Ted Williams is even out there.