Senate and House Leadership Porn0 Names

Why should Representative Weiner have all the fun? My new good friend Ed, from Ed’s Funny Pages, suggested that the House and Senate should all just adopt porn0 names since they have lost all sense of respectability.

He had this brilliant idea…

Dude practically has a porn0 name.

“Anthony Weiner, playing the part of Pizza Delivery guy ‘Tony Weiner’.”

Hell, the whole House of Representatives sounds like the cast of a porno.

Brilliant! I’m applying for porno names for the entire 112th Congress with Ed’s invaluable assistance.
Herewith is the cast of characters for the new hit porn0 “Whips and Weiners” starring the leadership of the U.S. House of Representatives and U.S. Senate.
This is a project of Two Heads are Better Than One.

Note: In order to keep this post just R rated, the obvious porn0 names (rhymes with Blunt) have been omitted from the list.
U.S. House of Representatives
  • Speaker of the House John Boehner
aka John Boner
  • Majority Leader Eric Canter
aka Ilick Panter
  • Majority Whip Kevin McCarthy

aka Sanchez McDirty

  • NRCC Chairman Pete Sessions (R-TX)

aka Peter Session

Republican Conference Chairman Jeb Hensarling (R-TX)
  • Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi
aka Fancy Peloosie
  • Minority Whip Steny Hoyer
aka Manny A. Voyeur
  • Assistant Minority Leader Jim Clyburn

aka Jimmy Floorburn

  • Democratic Caucus Chairman John Larson

Fun Buns Larson

  • Democratic Caucus Vice Chairman Xavier Becerra

aka Wear and Tear Mascara

U.S. Senate
  • Majority Leader Mitch McConnell
aka Bitchy McCornhole
  • Majority Whip Jon Kyl

aka Rankin Defile

  • Republican Conference Chairman Lamar Alexander

aka Lamar Blackwood (gotta admit, I don’t get this one Ed.)

  • Republican Conference Vice Chairman John Barrasso

Updike M’Asso

  • Republican Policy Committee Chairman John Thune
aka Blue Moon Thune
  • NRSC Chairman John Cornyn (R-TX)
aka Cornin The Barbarian
  • Minority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV)

Harry Bleed

  • Minority Whip Dick Durbin (D-IL)

aka Big Dick Derby (or Big Dick Throbin)

  • Democratic Caucus Vice Chairman Chuck Schumer

aka Suck D’Bloomers

  • Democratic Conference Secretary Patty Murray

aka Pat McFurry

  • Democratic Policy Committee Vice Chairman Debbie Stabenow

aka Debbie Suckmenow


Chime in with your suggestion for your Senator or Representative or Governor or Dog Catcher. Porn0 names R Us.

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Senate and House Leadership Porn0 Names — 3 Comments