UPDATE: She is showing you the M & M’s are without nuts.

(Well, somebody had to say it!)

Attention all companies who have a product they wish to have me rave about.
Time is running out. Get your samples and coupons for free stuff to me ASAP.
The FCC is on our trail.

the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) is considering to monitor blogs for undisclosed sponsored blog posts. According to the FTC, bloggers who don’t disclose that they received freebies once these new rules go into effect could become the target on an FTC investigation.

I just started doing pay per post, and one company says I can let you know that it is a sponsored post and another company said specifically I couldn’t let you know. (Of course the latter is in the U.K. so they care about the FCC about as much as I do.)

Yes, the same FCC that brought you government cheese for your TeeVee viewing pleasure, now wants to regulate me.

Bring it.

In the meantime, any company that want’s a free plug, like the Kush Night-time Breast Separator, should just get samples or coupons for free samples in the mail. (I hate my wrinkly cleavage, unlike these lovely boomer cleavages. – SFW)

I promise I will give you a glowing review and recommendation.

I’d prefer cash for my endorsement, $10+, but any freebie will do.  Will work for candy.

As much as those bloggers who receive these gifts would like to claim this isn’t the case, freebies like free laptops, trips, or gift cards are likely to influence a writer’s opinion of a product. We just heard from a food blogger last week who told us that she regularly receives expensive spices, books, and mail-order steaks from companies that won’t to be covered on her blog.

If somebody gave me a laptop or a Freakin’ Ford Fiesta or meat I sure as heck ain’t gonna bad mouth them! If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.

As ReadWriteWeb.com said:

We also can’t help to wonder how the FTC is going to monitor the thousands of small-time bloggers who regularly receive freebies.

They can’t.

So social media experts who work for clients  sitting on all that swag, that need some quick buzz, before it’s illegal (and even afterwards)  contact me.   @goinglikesixty or goinglikesixty@gmail.com. GoingLikeSixty.com is so small as to be invisible…

Our followers, which art of heathen, hollowhead be thy name,
Thy swagdom come, thy will be done, in blogs as it is in Heaven Hill.
Give us this day our daily freebie, and forgive us our FCC excesses, as we forgive blogs who excess against us.
And lead us not in to exemption, but deliver us some pure evil,
For Sixty is the blingdom, and the power, and the hoary glory, for ever and ever.
Amen.

The Junk Drawer Blog is goofing off somewhere this week, but she left an assignment for her commenters. She stole a comment game from Comedy Plus.

The Junk Drawer Blog is fun, but whoooo boy, her commenters are just so vanilla, so white bread, so unimaginative.

Here’s how SHE explained the Comment Game.

It’s very simple. I start the game off by listing two words or phrases, like waffles or pancakes, and you pick the one you like better. You can explain why if you like.

She started with Twitter or Facebook. Nice start, but OMG, her commenters responded with choices like:

• Mac or PC
• Coffee or Tea
• Boxers or Briefs
• Peanut Butter or Jelly

I. am. NOT. kidding. And it goes on for over 100 comments.

I played too, here were my choice:

• Po or Laa Laa – which the next person said they didn’t have a clue about. Dur, Hello Google? So I came back with…
• Clarabelle or Crusty – which the next poster didn’t know, but chose Clarabelle because it was a nice name! OMG, puh-leeze! My final entry, before I decided to hijack this idea was…
• Simon Cowell or Simon & Shuster. The next commenter chose Simon Cowell because she hadn’t heard of “the other one.”

LISTEN UP. Here’s the deal. I am taking over this idea.

There is a big prize involved.

A wonderful Marilyn Monroe shirt from the wonderful people at TeesForAll.com. I wanted a gift certificate from TeaseForMe.com, but haven’t heard back. TeesforAll.com is not doing this because they like me, they want to sell you some Tee shirts. Surprise. Surprise. Surprise. They have a really cool Stones shirt, and some other Boomer targeted stuff.

WIN THIS SHIRT

No, it doesn’t have to be the Marilyn Monroe baby-doll with pink stripes, unless you want it. And then I want a picture of you in it.

HERE’S HOW WE’RE GONNA PLAY:

It’s kind of like the The Junk Drawer Blog contest, BUT, the combinations need to be weird, arcane, tricky, smart, obscure, clever, whatever. (Like my examples! )

AND: you must explain why you chose the word you did, to avoid miscellaneous fakery.

After a while, I’ll close the comments and then we will vote on the best combination.  Finalists may be contacted to provide a full and complete explanation of their word combinations so you can’t fake it easily.

Got it? Good.

Here is my combination, you take it from here:

Sky King or Enola Gay?

Sunday Stealing: The Procrastination Tool Meme

Sunday Stealing stole this from Vylar Kaftan who called it a Procrastination meme. I guess she can call it whatever she wants and never reveal what she is avoiding.
I am not procrastinating, I jumped on this as the eighth thing I have done this morning.
Cheers to all us thieves!

1. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Any restaurant in Paris. Any of them.

2. What food could you eat for 2 weeks straight and not get sick of it? Cheeseburgers from the grill with Velveeta cheese slice, hamburger dill chips, and mustard. If tomatoes are in season, yes please.

3. Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Yes, just recently, a Basil Rathbone Johnny Carson Memorabilia Salesman from Sonoma.

4. What is the last heavy item you lifted? Off the ground completely? Carpet cleaner. Just lifted to move? Myself.

5. Have you ever been knocked unconscious? Yes, in a car wreck.

6. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? Sure, I can’t imagine why you would not want to know. Life’s last mystery? I don’t like surprises.

7. If you could change your name, what would you change it to? Bandit, but only if I had a really buff body to back it up.

8. What’s your goal for the year? 17.

9. Last person you hugged? Nancy.

10. First place you went this morning? Oh, for gawd’s sake, where does everybody go the first thing? I pee’d.

11. Do you always answer your phone? Nope, hardly ever. Really hacks Nancy off, but the calls are never for me. I pick the phone up and hand to her.

12. It’s four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it? Wrong number.

13. If you could change your eye color what would it be? I’m OK with my baby blues, but black would be interesting.

14. What’s on your wish list for your birthday? M & M’s

15. Does the future make you more nervous or excited? Nervous. I am so disappointed that I have to work the rest of my life. Anybody that says after working 40 years they can’t think of anything else they would rather do has a very limited imagination.

16. Do you have any saved texts? Sure, lots of them if referring to books. I don’t have a cell phone, so I have no text messages.

17. Ever been in a car wreck? Yes a few. Only one serious one when I was twenty.

18. Do you have an accent? Sure. Everybody does if plopped down 1000 miles from where they grew up.

19. What was the last song to make you cry? Songs give me goose-bumps, not tears. Do you call them chill-bumps? Goose-pimples?

20. What did you do last night? While awake, watched The Contender (3 stars/4), watched basketball, WKU vs. MTSU, blogged, read RSS, ate ice cream sundae (chocolate chip ice cream, caramel sauce, chocolate sauce and sliced bananas.)

21. Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Yes.

22. Current hate right now? Oh hate. Such a strong word. So I don’t hate. Strongly dislike? Too much to list, keep reading and I’ll let you know.

23. Met someone who changed your life? No.

24. How did you bring in the New Year? Sleeping.

25. What song represents you? Dear Old Fatty With a Crotch Warming Dell. (Lyrics to come.)

Larry Bird is head of Basketball Operations for the Indianapolis Pacers, it makes no sense why he is a greenie. They don’t have white/flesh M & M’s, I understand. Green is supposed to be the sexy M&M, he is such a dork, no way is he sexy.

But even more puzzling…

Why isn’t Magic Johnson a Brown M&M?

Oops: after this published I realized that I had made a racist remark. Two actually, one intentional, one subliminal.
Can you find the Baby Boomer racist statement?

And… yes, I know Magic played for the Lakers who wore yellow and Bird played for the Celtics who wore green.