Archive for the 'Technology' Category

Page 2 of 76

Apple Annouces the iTit

Published on July 30, 2009 in Entertainment and Technology. 6 Comments Tags: itit.

Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play high fidelity music in women’s breast implants.

The iTit will cost between $499.00 and $699.00 depending on speaker size.

The iTit considered to be a major breakthrough because women have always complained about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them…

UPDATE: On Brian’s suggestion, I checked to make sure the iTit was thoroughly tested. Here is a video of one of the tests.

UPDATE: Yanko Design has picked up on the iTit and offers this concept wireless mouse.

Erotic pleasure just took another techno turn and you can squarely blame the iTit for it. Deriving pleasure (rather inspiration) from Apple’s optical wireless mouse, the added feature to this design is tactile interaction with nipples! You read that right! A nipple provocatively beckons you to come and feel it…and responds to your caress as a joystick would.

UPDATE 2: For other concept iProducts: iShit, iBum, iBall, iCrotch, and Helena iVagina read this.

U.S. Internet Connectivity is Pathetic

Published on July 23, 2009 in Entertainment, kentucky, Money, Politics, Research and Technology. 0 Comments Tags: hazard, high speed, internet, kentucky, pikeville, speed test.

I just ran a speed test on how well I am connected to the internet.

Better than my cousin-sister in Hazard, KY, and better than my daddy-uncle in Pikeville, KY, but 1/2 the speed of my friend Elin Woods, in Sweden, and 1/12 the speed of my long-lost friend Danny Choo in Japan.

Right now the government is deciding the future of the Internet in the United States.

The Federal Communications Commission is crafting our national high speed internet strategy, which will determine how fast the Internet is and who has access to high speed connections.

Help shape this policy in just two minutes.

Take this Speed Test, and help update data and help make universal broadband a reality.

Take the Speed Test now:

http://www.speedmatters.org/speedtest2009

Then fill in the form to send a letter to your feral (no typo – little or no contact with real people) representatives. I personalized my letter because Speedmatters.org was just too nice in their letter.

The United States ranks just 15th among industrialized nations in broadband access — and this is costing our economy billions of dollars every year.

Every day, American businesses are missing out on opportunities to sell their goods and services in the global marketplace. Every day, the American people are missing out on important health and educational benefits. And every day, the American economy is missing out on good jobs created by high speed internet access.

That’s because the U.S. has historically invested relatively less on telecommunications than most other major countries. Consumers are charged more for slower speeds, and our current high-speed networks don’t even reach millions of American households.

Like Bubba-Louise, my cousin-sister in Hazard can’t even watch Keyboard Cat, because it won’t download.
H/she needs to see this stuff:

I Killed Twitter

Published on July 22, 2009 in Technology. 1 Comment Tags: fail whale, killed twitter, twitterfox.

I just killed Twitter. Not the whole thing, so if the Fail Whale shows up today, don’t blame me. I just quit following Twitter via Twitterfox, and I never go to the website (same as 80% of other Twitter users.)

A WordPress plug-in posts to Twitter when I put up a new post, so don’t mistake that as being me.

I just don’t see the value in Twitter.

I think Twitter is for those who have a life (or a business to promote.)

Geeky Animated Gif Monday: Dead People Edition

Published on July 13, 2009 in Baby Boomer, Entertainment and Technology. 0 Comments Tags: ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, heath ledger, michael jackson.

Doesn’t seem right that Billy Mays isn’t included.

Leading Our Lives Via Search Engines

Published on July 3, 2009 in Technology. 4 Comments Tags: single serving websites.

Here’s what trending high on Google now. (I took out the searches for the hot Fox news babe, drunken women’s soccer player, the sex tape teacher, and some )

I pity the people who are so out of it that they don’t know if the post office or banks or stock markets are open… today… Friday… July 3rd. So they go f**king Google it.

Now, if you sneeze and need help, go here.

If you just told a groaner joke and need suitable sound effects, go here.

Twitter sluggish? think it’s down? Go here.

Definitily? definitaly? It’s here.

Is today Christmas? Santa looks here.

Going to rain? Your local weather forecaster looks here.

Unemployed? Looking for a new career? Is Pimping Hard? Check here.

Need to know what President Obama is promising? Here’s what some people thought.

Having some self esteem issues? Are you awesome? It’s here.

But let’s be careful out there folks with the Google search. Banks are open today, the post office is open today, and fireworks shows will be all weekend, and Wimbledon is tennis, who cares? Unless you need a couple women grunting for some nefarious web video you are constructing.

Grunt And Moan. – A funny movie is a click away

Happy 3rd of July. Which is a new national holiday.