I Can Has Forum? AARP? or Very Serious, You Are on Fire, Just Kidding

Published on February 5, 2010 in Baby Boomer. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , .


*Jumping with joy*
There are two new forums that I found for you. One isn’t active yet…

  • Community will have exciting improvements in April. From easier ways to join interesting conversations to faster searches, you’ll find connecting with others more fun than ever. You’ll also discover…
  • New technology for a smoother and more dynamic user experience
  • Feature enhancements to support and showcase your discussions, comments, photos, and more

Check out the AARP Guide Blog to learn more about the new Online Community.

Or… and this is the one I am recommending: Very Serious, You Are on Fire, Just Kidding. Why am I recommending this? Because you CAN draw a picture of a dinosaur and post it and everybody thinks you are just the best ever dino-drawer.

Frontrunner

is how my entry was described. And if YOU LIKE TO TYPE IN WITH CAPS LOCK ON, THERE IS A CAPS LOCK AREA. But be careful, this is an internet forum and it can get dangerous. There will be words:

  • goiter-tits
  • Penis-hands
  • Kitten-monger
  • German Toe-Face
  • Soggy juice-mouth
  • chair sniffer

These words may be used against you. Just because there is a hyphen in the word, don’t think these words are not serious words. Because this forum is Very Serious.

YOU ARE ON FIRE.

Just Kidding.

Vote for Murray Hill Inc. in Maryland Congressional Race

Published on February 4, 2010 in Baby Boomer. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , .

Vote for Murray Hill

Murray Hill Incorporated has just announced its intention to run for Congress in Maryland’s 8th Congressional District.

Murray Hill Inc. is believed to be the first “corporate person” to exercise its constitutional right to run for office. As Supreme Court observer Lyle Denniston wrote in his SCOTUSblog, “If anything, the decision in Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission conferred new dignity on corporate “persons,” treating them — under the First Amendment free-speech clause — as the equal of human beings.”

Murray Hill Inc. plans on spending “top dollar” to protect its investment.

“It’s our democracy,” Murray Hill Inc. says, “We bought it, we paid for it, and we’re going to keep it.”

The campaign’s designated human, Eric Hensal, will help the corporation conform to antiquated “human only” procedures and sign the necessary voter registration and candidacy paperwork.

To emphasize its point, this liberal public relations firm will file to run in the Republican primary.

Is Hooters Contributing to Deliquency of Young Boys?

Published on February 4, 2010 in Baby Boomer. 3 Comments Tags: , , , .

Trick question.

Of course not. Taking a boy to Hooters – as a single act – doesn’t make him a pervert or ingrain a disrespect for women and objectify them.

It takes a village to accomplish that.

Catch Her In the Wry wrote about boys going to Hooters. She made the point…

If the picture above showed three 20 something men in loin cloths leaning close in and rubbing themselves on a 14 year old girl, would these parents be so willing to subject their daughters to such atrocity?

Today I read this…

Chicagoland Hooters locations have raised over $385,000 for the Holy Family Lutheran School. On Tuesdays during the month of February, all eleven Chicago-area Hooters Restaurants donate 1/3 of their world-famous chicken wing sales to Holy Family’s Tuition Assistance Fund.

It’s Holy Family Night at Hooters! Bring the children, let them enjoy the breasts and the wings all in the name of God and Family. Praise Jesus and all the little children!

It’s too bad I was raised in the midwest, then I wouldn’t be so titillated by the Hooters Girls and if I had sons I could take them to Hooters too… like a lot of parents do.

A “Hooters Dad” said it was OK if his daughter was fawned over by a bunch of well endowed men.

I should also ask myself if I would take my 10-year-old daughter to a place that featured muscular men in tight shorts serving her food. I would have no problem with that.

Turns out the Hooters Dad wasn’t so smart after all, his son later said he regretted it because some people who saw him there.

My son told me tonight that he regrets the trip to Hooters. We ran into his football coaches at the restaurant, and they have razzed him about it ever since. “This will take a long time to go away,” he said, adding that “I can see teasing me about it at the next football practice but not three practices later.” I could only tell him, “That’s just what guys do.”

It takes a village to objectify women, because “that’s just what guys do.”
Yeah, parents, coaches, preachers, and pastors and principals.

Note: If you want to read about the ensuing uproar Hooter’s Dad caused, AOL did a follow-up. Out of 42,000+ votes, 72% said it was OK to take kids – any age – to Hooters because it’s a “family restaurant.”

Booger Walls

Published on February 3, 2010 in Baby Boomer. 7 Comments Tags: , , , , .


Did you have a booger wall near your bed growing up? Me neither. I used the sheet or bedspread.

Steam Me Up Kid had a booger wall that apparently rivaled any creation by Rembrandt. Well, at least it was far better than her brothers.

Not to brag, but my booger wall kicked his booger wall’s ass. I had all sorts of dander allergies, plus I’m just competitive like that. Mine was maybe 3 ft x 2 ft, with the majority of boogers clustered toward the middle. His was a mess. No sense of boundaries or organization at all. No forethought in the placement. Scattered and careless. I pitied him for his pathetic booger wall.

Yes, this was the grossest post I have read on the innerwebs. Naturally, I will add my memory of  Fourth Grade and the Flying Blood Clot.

Russell was the polio kid in our class. As a result, he got to rest more. There was a storage box near the back of the classroom and Russell would lie down on his blanket and rest regularly.

I watched him rest. That was my rest. It made me wish I had polio.

Full scale replica of blood clot

One event broke me of watching him rest.

Apparently Russell had earlier picked his nose until it bled. It had clotted by the rest time, so Russell started digging away again.

I looked over just to see him pull a clot from his nose the size of a large slug on the end of his finger and flick it against the wall at the foot of his resting place.

If the janitor ever saw that blood clot on the wall, he never touched it.

Every time I  looked at the wall that blood clot booger was there.

It probably still is, because the school is still standing.

Held together by thousands of boogers.

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