Tag Archive for 'ellen degeneres'

Ellen DeGeneres and Her Reciprocating Saw

Published on March 12, 2009 in Empty Nesters, Entertainment, Family and Health. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , .

We Tivo Ellen because she always gives us a laugh. Always. She related yesterday how she likes to saw things. She was just pleased as punch that the brother of her spouse, Portia De Rossi, gave her a Sawzall brand reciprocating saw for Christmas.

Reciprocating saws are awesome. They have a single blade sticking out from the motor and the blade moves rapidly back and forth in a sawing action. It enables the sawer to get into some tight places to saw.

So when I read this today, I couldn’t help, could. not. help. but make the connection.

Maryland State Police airlifted the 27-year-old woman to Prince George’s County Hospital Center early Sunday morning after she was injured in an incident involving a sex toy attached to a saber saw blade, TheBayNet.com first reported.

The man who called 911 about the incident admitted attaching the sex toy to the saw and then using the high-powered, homemade device on his partner, according to the St. Mary’s County Sheriff’s Office.

Here’s the unasked and unanswered question. Who thought this would be a great idea?

Jenna Bush Hager Tells Ellen DeGeneres “Get Married at My Daddy’s Ranch”

Published on May 24, 2008 in Baby Boomer. 0 Comments Tags: , , , , , .

Here’s something every boomer parent can identify with: your kid offering your house, ranch, estate, lodge, trailer, for a gigantic party to honor people who have different values than you.
Jenna Bush Hagar told Ellen DeGeneres she could get married to Portia DeRossi at Daddy’s ranch in Crawford.
Well, it almost happened that way…

Observes DeGeneres: “So, the ranch was a great place to get married – it looked like nobody could fly over and get pictures or bother you, really.”

“Yeah,” concurs Hager, “that was really nice” – which prompts DeGeneres to ask, “So, can we borrow it for our wedding, can we get the ranch?”

“Sure,” replies an obliging Hager.

“Okay, great,” says DeGeneres.

Mama Bush kept out of the conversation. Does this mean Laura Bush has no say in who parties in Crawford and they have to consult Daddy?
How many times did you have this conversation? “Well, you’ll have to talk with your father.”