Tag Archive for 'traci bingham'

Bing: Microsoft’s New Search Engine. Bill Gates Retains Prickdom

Published on May 29, 2009 in Technology. 3 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , .


Microsoft tried to make some big waves in the tech world by announcing a new search engine called Bing.

Besides the fact that Bing means “disease” in Chinese and has already been referred to as Because It’s Not Google, Bing is pretty much a made up word.

Never mind that Google should really have been spelled gogol, at least it’s derived from a term that means “large number.”

Bing on the other hand suggests:

BING VS. BING

LONG-TIME FORTUNE COLUMNIST AND BEST-SELLING AUTHOR STANLEY BING CONDEMNS “BRAND INTRUSION” BY NEW MICROSOFT SEARCH ENGINE, ALSO TO BE NAMED “BING”

OFFERS SERVICES TO NEW ENTITY FOR “ANY REASONABLE OFFER”

Bill Gates is a Prick.

UPDATE: Har. Microsoft marketing decided they would try to get cute and actually respond to The Real Bing, and among other things they offered.

Let’s do lunch. In the meantime we are sending you a case of moderately priced cigars.
Your pals,
Bing.com

Hello boys? Cigars come in boxes, Bourbon comes in cases.  You could look it up on Bing.com if the site was actually working.

Did Milburn Drysdale marry Ellie May Clampett?

Published on October 29, 2008 in Empty Nesters and Entertainment. 4 Comments Tags: .

You no doubt have your Halloween costume all ready to go, perhaps even have worn it once already. Nancy is wearing hers today to bowling. She is going as Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. There is only one reason for her choosing that character: Toto! She is putting Sofi in a basket to be her Toto. No pix yet, but soon, I’m sure.

2008 version of Dorothy and Toto? An early halloween costume? A zealous trick-or-treater?

No, this is Traci Bingham. If you need to enlarge for “details” just click away.

When I saw this picture I was struck by one, not two ideas. Well OK, two, but not the two obvious ones.

1. Why is she dressed like this to take out the trash?

2. Why is she taking out the trash?

I Google ™ searched her and found this to be her career so far (she’s 40).
Movies

  • Demon Knight (1995)
  • Beach Movie (1998)
  • Foolish (1999)
  • The Private Public (2000)
  • Longshot (2000)
  • More Mercy (2003)
  • Four Fingers of the Dragon (2003) (short subject)
  • Malibooty! (2003)
  • Hanging in Hedo (2007)
  • Black Widow (2008)

Television

  • Baywatch (cast member from 1996-1998)
  • The Dream Team< (1999) (canceled after 4 episodes)
  • Strip Mall (cast member in 2000)
  • To Tell The Truth (occasional panelist 2000-01)
  • BattleBots (host in 2001)
  • Celebrity Boot Camp (2002)
  • Celebrity Big Brother (cast member in 2006)
  • The Surreal Life: Fame Games (2007)
  • The Tyra Banks Show (2 episodes) (2007)
  • 2 Minute Drill(1 episodes) (2002?)

Then another question pops up.

How can she afford to have trash? I did a quick calculation and figured that after taxes a career like that would give her a net income of about $37,793 total. This doesn’t include other “off-the-books” income of course.

Answer: she is married to a banker.

Which raises another question: a banker??? a banker??? How proud he must be to take her to the annual Beverly Hills Bankers Ball.

Oh! Idea for reality show: Beverly Hills Banker! Milburn Drysdale marries Ellie May Clampett.

But I’m really puzzled over the original two questions. The second more than the first. Those are probably the only clothes she has that fit so she has to wear them to take out the trash.

So why is she taking out the trash? Doesn’t she have “people” to do that? I would. As a matter of fact, if I was rich, I would have a person who would be a live-in and be at my beck and call strictly to do chores like this one. Nancy could have one too of course. I think in our burg we could get a nice, dependable, couple to live in our Maison De Woofhaus for 100 grand plus medical. When we are traveling, which would be a LOT, they could take that time off to recover from our exhausting demands. But when we are living at our Sedona ranch, they would be expected to come along with us – coach of course.

Here’s an example of some of the duties my “people” would be expected to do for me:

  • Empty wastebaskets
  • Take out the trash
  • Pick up my socks
  • Refill the M & M’s
  • Reach that
  • Replace light bulbs
  • Put that away

Hmmm, that’s not a very long list. After all, we would have a cooker-person and a cleaner-person.

Doesn’t Traci have these people?

I’m feeling a little sorry for Traci.

I think she needs a hug.

UPDATE: