Did you hear about the drunken woman and her daughter who hijacked a horse-drawn wedding carriage and ran down a one-legged man on a mobility scooter?

A story like that doesn’t need a punch line. It’s true.

The Argus, in Britain, is reporting that “a drunk woman caused chaos when she hijacked a horse-drawn wedding carriage and ran down a one-legged man on a mobility scooter.”The paper says the unidentified woman and her daughter jumped in the carriage and whipped the massive shire horses, Charlie and Buster, until they bolted from the front of a pub in Peacehaven.

Remember the lyrics from Calamity Jane?

Oh the Deadwood Stage is a-rollin’ on over the plains
With the curtains flappin’ and the driver slappin’ the reins
A beautiful sky, a wonderful day…

So whip crack-away, whip crack-away, whip crack-away
The wheels go turnin’ round, homeward bound
Can’t you hear ’em hummin’

There has to be a ballad in this story. Peacehaven, Charlie, Buster, it happened near the Good Companion Pub after a Sikh wedding. Oh My God, our fodder it’s heaven.

Even the comments following this story are great. Be sure to read all of them too.

Martin, Brighton “Sgt Robin Fuller, of Sussex Police, said: “This is an extremely unusual event in Peacehaven”

No Scheisse Sherlock – thought it happened everyday

I think it sounds like a scene from Thelma and Louise myself.