I still have all my body parts.

• Tonsils? Check
• Appendix? Check
• Wisdom teeth? Check
• Gall Bladder? Check
• Left nut? Check (guys are always giving their left nut for something…)

So what you say? So if you had your appendix out, and you get deserted in the hills of West Virginny, you may be sorry (other than the Deliverance factor.) 

I on the other hand have the capability to regenerate my “gut flora.”

I am now commandeering that medical term to describe my big belly – it is “gut flora.”

In a healthy digestive system there is a huge crowd of bacteriums, the good guys, wandering around looking to help digest your pizza, red wine, chocolate muffins and M&M’s.

That’s your “gut flora.”

But if you get the shit smoothies because somebody has been crapping in your drinking water, your gut may get cleaned out of those little helpy bacteria digestivers.

So then you would need your appendix to “release the hounds” and help your gut flora rebloom like Oprah during her thin days.

I am a complete man. I will survive like a cock-a-roach if I get thrown out of my limo by a military junta while sealing a deal for the Trumpster for a golf course/manure factory in southern Phlambarno province.