It’s About Time the PGA Announced it’s Drug Testing Policy
It is about time that the PGA addressed the illegal use of drugs among professional golfers. Have you noticed how big these guys have gotten? It’s obvious that they are taking Human Growth Hormones. (HGH)
The PGA Tour plans to start its drug-testing program next year after six months of an intensive education program, with penalties for a positive test ranging from a one-year suspension for the first offense to a lifetime ban if a player is caught three times.
They can’t be pounding the ball 385 yards off the tee with only technology. (Well actually they can.) They can’t be hitting it higher and working the ball better only because of technology. (Well actually they can.) It can’t be because they are eating better, working out, and practicing more. (Well actually it can.)
Its gotta be illegal drugs. Have you seen the size of some of these players?
OK, there’s Tiger, and then there is everyone else:
- Mickelson – 6’3″ 200 lbs (on a good day Mr. Man Boobs) #2 on money list
- Vajayjay Singh – 6’2″ 200 #3
- Strickler – 6′ even 190 #4
- K.J. Choi – 5’8″ 185 #5
- Sabbatini – 5’10” 165 #6
- Furyk – 6’2″ 185 #7
You get the idea. The top players either are in good shape, smaller than their peers or larger fatter than their peers.
The only advantage to doping in golf is for the caddies. Those poor schlubs lugging around 900 pounds of crap should be allowed to dope up.
But as always, it’s the big money sponsorships that are talking. Golf may be the only clean sport left – and only because there is no advantage to the players. They should dope the crowd – now that would be fun!
I don’t know a thing about golf, but I never knew a caddy who wasn’t stoned. Actually, golf looks pretty boring to me, so it could probably use some drugs to liven things up.
I’ve never had a caddy before – but if I had a caddy he absolutely would need to be mellow. Hell, me too.
They’re in good shape because they walk the course. You don’t see them riding around the courses in some fancy, smancy electric carts. It takes real men (with balls, shafts, and heads) to play golf.
@Catch Her In The Wry: real men – ahahashahahaha. They may have the requisite equipment, but they are just walking!
Me? Ride, Baby, Ride.
Well, we already know John Daly has come forth and announced his drug use (alcohol). I’ve even seen him smashed during a tournament. Oh, but he’s NOT in shape…
Yes, I had Daly in mind, but he really is the odd man on the tour. He can still win, but most of the guys are in far better shape. But I can’t see golfers – at any level – doping.
Drugs are being used by the Golf Player’s? It sounds so confusing. Golf doesn’t require lot of energy when you are playing it, so why need to take drugs ?