Woo Hoo Kraft, settle down! Your celebration of Grilled Cheese Month is likely to crash the innerwebs.
Gentle readers, mark April 16 on your calendar because you do not want to miss out on the chance to win a free pack of processed cheese food aka Kraft Singles.
The first 1,000 people who submit their favorite grilled cheese memory at iheartgrilledcheese.com on April 16 will receive a coupon for one free pack of Kraft Singles. (Har. GrilledCheese.com is owned by Terry Curran firstname.lastname@example.org)
“We hope to hear from consumers in terms of what their favorite grilled cheese memories are,” Basil Maglaris, Kraft spokesman, said.
How about the forty-leben times I had a third degree burn to the roof of my mouth from hot cheese and had that little flap of skin hanging down for a couple days following?
Or the fifty bazillion times a big old stringy glob of hot yellow processed cheese food fell in my lap?
Hold the friggin’ telegraph, Maggie, there’s more!
They will have a Grilled Cheese Invitational and cook-off competition in the heart of Grilled Cheese country: Los Angeles, California, U.S.A.
“We were just looking for a couple of exciting ways to bring excitement to Grilled Cheese Month,” Maglaris said.
We are part owners of Kraft and this next part just send chills down by underwear because of the severe economic impact this could have on 1. Kraft and 2. The Grilled Cheese biz in L.A.
During the event, Kraft will distribute grilled cheese sandwiches to the 100 participants and attendees.
I love grilled cheese. I love Kraft American Singles Processed Cheese Food. I love Government Cheese. (Post Punk, Punk, Indie) I often eat the All American White Boys Lunch. Wonder Bread and Kraft American Processed Cheese Food. I love Baloney and Grilled Processed Cheese Food.
Remember when you had to buy Velveeta bricks to make a Grilled Cheese? I never had the patience to look for the wire cheese slicer, so I just grabbed a table knife and smushed it through the brick time and time again.
Then there always was the foil left on the end of the Velveeta that one had to carefully fold over so the cheese didn’t turn to dry chemicals.
With that said, I wouldn’t fart from a roller coaster for a chance to win ONE package of Kraft Processed Cheese Food.
Kraft: send cheese to everybody! Put one slice in an envelope. You want people talking about Kraft Processed Cheese Food? They will be talking if you send one to every household.