Ten Ways to Save That the Experts Will Never Tell
Are you as sick of reading and hearing “financial advisors” tell you how to save money and none of them apply to you?
For example: Don’t drink Starbucks, walk to work or take the bus, put a brick in your toilet tank, never throw away toothbrushes, rent DVDs – don’t go to movies, blah, yada, blah, blah, horse crap!
They all say basically the same thing. eg: some say instead of a brick, fill a two liter bottle and put it in your tank, another will tell you to put your old shoes in the tank.
Here are my ten ways to really save money that you have never heard or read, and that apply to real life situations:
- Stop leaving tips. Imagine the positive impact this would have. Restaurants would actually have to pay a competitive wage to get excellent servers. All the others would work Jiffy Lube.
- Take your own beverage to the movies. You haven’t read or heard this, but you know you’ve done it. Well, do it all the time. If you want a beer, take it! You think the minimum wage pot head is going to bust you? While the movie is running they are all in the projection room doing unspeakable things to each other.
- Steal your neighbor’s wireless internet connection.
- Cut your own hair. You know, the FlowBee is still on the market because it works. If you can stand it, get a buzz. Don’t shave your head because that requires maintenance.
- Cheat more on your income tax. It’s not too late. You can still file an amended return in the U.S. Remember that money you loaned me, but I never paid back? It’s deductible.
- Smoke cheaper cigars. Buying them individually and paying $3-$5 is for suckers. Buy a box and a $20 humidor.
- Take all the pennies from the penny tray to pay for stuff you buy at the convenience store. Sometimes there is as much as 35-40 cents there.
See? Much more realistic and certainly a lot more fun and challenging! Now about that $300 of our money the gummit is giving back? Stash it, you’re going to need a good bankruptcy attorney.
What’s a FlowBee?
Cheryl’s last blog post..Twenty Major’s blook
@Cheryl: It’s the Professional Home Haircutting System as advertised on TV.
Ah.
Cheryl’s last blog post..Twenty Major’s blook
The wireless thing worked well a couple years ago. Pretty much everyone has gotten the hang of securing their wireless gateway now :-(.
Pete’s last blog post..A Must Listen To For Anyone Interested in Music
@Pete: Too bad for you. My neighbor has an open network. But I don’t steal from him.