Saint Todd DeCubbville talked with an airline reservations agent who was of dot Indian descent. (As opposed to feather Indian.) When he hung up, he wondered who’s brilliant idea it was for them to adopt anglicized names. She chose Grace.

Therefore, the next time I call tech support, I am Samarendu which means Lord Vishnu.

I also thought that the next time I left my name with a twenty something at the restaurant while waiting to be seated I will become Lars Nicholesrughfnesczyk.

She will say “whaaaat?” and I will repeat it slowly: Nicholesrughfnesczyk.

“whaaaat? how do you spell that?”

And I will say “just like it sounds” and she will look at me funny, not ha-ha funny, but funny-odd, and Nancy will give her our real name and the twenty something will look at me like I’m and old fool and then I will say “klosnotic, klosnotic!” and she will take Nancy to the table and when I sit down she will then give me a stern look and say, “you are an old fool.”

But we did have fun using the name Soprano with Saint Todd DeCubbville and Amy, when we were being seated in the Grand Canyon, back when The Soprano’s was at it’s height of fame. Actually we didn’t sit in the Grand Canyon, we were seated in the El Tovar Lodge Restaurant, which in feather Indian means “grand-unwise-elder” (old fool.)