One would think that after 61 years, I would learn.

There are no such things as $20,000 homes for sale in Ft. Myers, Florida.

There are no $14.99 Bark Busters.

Yet in the past week, I have tried to buy one and failed, and tried to buy the other and succeeded.

Both were pretty stupid attempts.

You probably can figure out that at $20,000 home in Ft. Myers, FL didn’t last long on the market. By the time…

• Nancy read about the website in Parade magazine
• shopped around the site
• told me of her find
• waited for me to get done scoffing

…the house was on contract.

But here’s the deal on the Bark Buster.

When your dog barks, this sonic unit emits a harmless, high-pitched pulse inaudible to humans, but extremely irritating to dogs. He soon learns to stop this unwanted behavior. Portable and water-resistant, it has two sensitivity levels and is effective from up to 20 ft. away. Use it indoors or outdoors, on its stand or wall-mounted (hardware included). Uses one 9V battery (not included). High-impact plastic. 5″ long.

$14.99

My fingers flew across the keyboard to get this gadget as quickly as possible. Out of the 129 batteries we have in Zee Haus and Hof, we had nary a 9 volt. A quick trip to Walgreen’s and back and we were in business with the Bark Buster.

I turned the level to high and put it on a window ledge within 6 inches of the back of the chair where Derby perches do do his neighborhood watch.

Within minutes a leaf blew across the yard and Derby was sounding the alarm to rally the rest of the herd to join the chorus. They did.
Nancy looked at me, I looked at her, waiting for the barking to suddenly cease.

It didn’t.

$14.99: should have spent it on Miller Chill.