I didn’t write this book.

But any guy that designed a workout machine for Jackie Chan is pretty tops in my book. BTW: Jackie Chan is starring a new movie The Shinjuku Incident, for all you Jackie Chan movie buffs.
But I digress.

Do It or Age Quickly is by JB Berns.
JB Berns created the Urban Rebounder. You know, the little trampoline that is now in thousands of professional and home gyms…

JB Berns & Urban Rebounder

I’m sure this made him a rich man. If that didn’t the Jackie Chan Cable Flex System as seen on Tee Vee certain did.

I admire any Boomer that comes up basically a kids toy and a book full of little tidbits that are done in only Sixty seconds and can make a living.

Berns promises if you do his 21 recommendations, you will have better hair, better skin, better sex, less stress, lose weight, gain flexibility and be able to speak seven languages.

(I made up the part about the promise and the languages.)

You won’t buy into all his advice. Like I had a little trouble with a lot of his advice just because I’m that way.

He advises you on

• sleeping positions to improve your health
• how to sit in a chair
• how to exercise your guts and other body parts
• isometric exercise
• products that will improve your life and looks
• animal exercises
• getting stronger sex organs
• rebounding
• and of course diet

… and whole bunch of other stuff…

For example, he says during sex you should click or clench your teeth for healthier teeth. Thirty six times you should open and close your teeth at least 1/2 an inch. (Or you can do it when you poop too.) Nom. Nom. Nom. Oh. Yes. Yes. Yes.

But as with any self-help book, you can pick and choose which you wish to apply to your life. I like some of the stretching exercises and would wouldn’t love massaging oneself with a loofah for Sixty seconds?

I’ve incorporated many of JB Berns isometric exercises into my pre-lap swimming routine.

Yes, there are dirty drawings included. In the section on animal exercises, JB Berns illustrates the 12 acupuncture points around a vagina. I’m guessing he had some help in this area. He has no opinion on whether or not the G Spot really and truly exists.

And the correction position to massage a prostate gland is also illustrated.

Uck. Pass.

A big part of the book is recommendations on products JB Berns recommends to improve live better, stronger and longer.

This is a skimmable book, which I like. I figure if I grab some useful hints and tips (which I did) I’m ahead of where I started.

If I decide I need to kick Jackie Chan’s ass, I’ll have a reference book on how to get in shape. Which of course would end in me writing a book: I Did It and Died Quickly.