I did a pay-per-post on NavTeq recently because May is Upgrade Your Satellite Navigation System month.

The Dodge Magnum Hemi I drive is five years old. When I first got the car it didn’t have turn-by-turn directions for Smallburg. Sat Nav was still a fairly new technology back in the day.

This wasn’t really a problem then because I didn’t need turn by turn-by-turn direction from NavTeq. I don’t know street names anyway. I just get from place to place based on the stores that are nearby.

Now that I am a River Rat and will be exploring local rivers, creeks, streams, lakes, and large bodies of standing storm water, I thought I would invest $199.95 and upgrade my factory-installed satellite navigation system.

Until I read my own pay-per-post, I didn’t have a clue that NavTeq is the supplier for most American cars navigation systems. They are, I read.

I got the CD update and popped it in the car, drove to the Vet to get Sedona’s “bitch” pills (canine Prozac) and by the time I got there, the system was upgraded.

Selected “home” as my destination, NavTeq informed me that turn-by-turn directions were not available in my area.

Whuck?

Screw this. I want my money back.
NavTeq said they would be happy to give my money back IF I returned the CD UNOPENED.

Double whuck? I explained that it’s hard to install a CD while it’s still in the jewel case wrapped in cellophane. The subtlety whooshed over Ms. NavTeq.

She had me read the numbers from the original CD which ended in “AC.” The new CD ended in AI – indicating that there were in fact updates from AC, to AD, to AE, etc. etc. Ms. NavTeq reassured me that people had driven miles and miles of streets and roads and provided many changes.

I asked if there was anything I could do to make the updates work. She said apparently something just wasn’t “clicking.”

After four refusals to take back the CD because it had been opened, I told Ms. NavTeq I would just dispute the payment via my credit card and she and Visa can fight it out.

NavTeq Sat Nav Tech Support and Customer Service: FAIL.

I don’t feel better venting. I want my NavTeq to be updated.