Rule of Sixty: If I have an appointment and need to grab a quick bite, it will end up in my lap.
Proof: Taco Bell Fresco Bean Burrito when bitten on one end will squish all the ingredients (mostly refried beans) out the other end with sufficient force to squirt out the other end on the perfect trajectory to land in my crotch.
Wiped off refried beans when dry looks exactly like I pooped my pants.
Appointment delayed only slightly.
Speaking of poop, I love this commercial.
I went #2, but I look like #1… I poo in blue…