To Help You In This Busy Season, Here Are TV News Headlines For the Rest of 2010
This is a terribly busy time of year for a lot of folks. Me? Not so much. It’s generally cold outside, so I stay inside, unless there is someplace to go in the car and then I go outside to warm up the car and we go someplace inside the car where it’s warm and then dash inside where its warm.
Not terribly busy time of the year for me.
You however, are probably different. You probably have office parties to attend, you probably pray at church, you might even be in the choir at church and are busy rehearsing for your Christmas holiday chorale. There are gifts to buy for everyone from the mail delivery person to your loved ones. And wrapping! Will it ever end? Of course in the middle of this there is the preparation of that massive Thanksgiving day feast. Then it’s hitting the sales to grab some of those once-in-a-lifetime offers.
In the meantime, I will be safely ensconced in the big ole recliner watching the Big Ass TV and surfing the innerwebs. The least I could do is give you television local/state/national news headlines from now until the end of the year.
Here ya go – the headlines from your local/state/national newscast from 11/21 to 12/31:
- President pardons turkey
- Why do you need a nap after that big feast?
- Where do all those turkeys come from?
- Butterball Turkey Hotline busy helping frantic callers
- People are lined up outside Best Buy
- Death and destruction in rush to buy television
- Disaster movie draws Thanksgiving Day crowds
- Homeless dumpster diving banned
- Cyber Monday is bigger than Black Friday
- Toys people will kill to own
- Dick Cheney says Christmas is overrated
- Why college football is essential to U.S. national security
- Surprising bump in retail sales
- Rioting at the gas pumps as prices skyrocket
- College football playoffs fact or fantasy?
- Apocalypse near: churches see increase in attendance
- Retailers optimistic about shopping season
- Shoplifting on the increase
- Harsh winter means oil prices skyrocket
- Surprising cold snap kills dozens
- Airport security tightens as terrorist invade Nova Scotia
- Unseasonable warm spell offers a break for shoppers
- Charity giving is down
- Salvation Army gets an unusual donation
- UPS struggles to keep up
- Doctors warn of coming killer flu
- Tomorrow is busiest day of the year for post office
- Poor die first during cold snap
- Volunteers gather to wrap gifts for needy
- Fire destroys Christmas for family
- Winter storm blasting its way toward us
- Christmas parades cancelled because of security concerns
- Goodwill sees uptick in donations at year end
- Personal debt rises during holiday season
- Baby Jesus stolen
- Reward offered for return of Baby Jesus
- Baby Jesus recovered
- Santa spotted leaving North Pole
- Red Cross makes plea for blood
- Long lines at the returns counter
- Cab companies offer free rides
- Twelve car pileup kills 54 children
- New Year’s Day hangover can kill
- Why 1/1/11 is causing panic
I’m glad I could help you in this busy time of year.
If you want details, drop me an email: SameOleShit@gmail.com. Include the item from above that you wish to have details and I’ll respond here – or leave a comment below. I’ll give you the full 24 second report with video.
great post-so true. I remember the days of doing the day after Thanksgiving shopping rush and the free dinners on Thanksgiving. Its the same shit different year. You hit the nail on the head.
LOL! Thanks so much. Yep. Same shit, different day.
I don’t have office parties. I don’t do Thanksgiving and thereby save 5500 calories. We are not exchanging gifts this year since none of us really need anything. I don’t go to church and don’t do Black Friday shopping (I hate crowds). I don’t even have a recliner and a big-ass TV. But, I will be putting up some Christmas decorations and lift a glass of something on New Year’s Eve.
Note to readers: He has nothing to do at this time of year because his wife does it all!!
@all:
Yeah.
Yup.
Yes.
Yep.
This is how I know you come from a newspaper background. Because you and I both know that every newspaper in the country has a file full of these articles that get trotted out year after year and are only slightly updated with fresh quotes, new photos, or updated statistics. It’s the same way Cosmopolitan magazine manages to run the same ten stories issue after issue for 45 years.
@Brian: never said differently. Just newspaper aren’t limited to 12 minutes to present 14 “stories.” You’re right and we just skip over them because they are equally lame.