Big Bad Don

Big Bad Don (parody of Big Bad John by Jimmy Dean)
Every noon, about twelve o nine you could see him arrive
He stood six foot two and two eighty five
Kinda broad in the middle and around the hip
And everybody knew ya didn’t give no lip to big Don
(Big Don, big Don)
Big bad Dion (big Don)
Nobody seemed to know where Don called home
He just drifted into town and stayed all alone
He said a lot, a loudmouth guy
And if you listened at all, you just heard shit from Big Don
Somebody said he came from Queens
Where he got in a fight over a bankruptcy lien
And a crashin’ blow from a tiny right hand
Sent a Duetche Bank fellow to the promised land, big Don
(Big Don, big Don)
Big bad Don (big Don)
Then came the day at the bottom of the DOJ
When a case cracked and men started cryin’
Family was payin’ and hearts beat fast
And everybody thought that they’d breathed their last, ‘cept Don
Through the Covid and the recession of this man-made hell
Walked a spineless man that the staffers knew well
Grabbed a saggin’ Russian, who gave him a loan.
And like a puny little sap he just stood there alone, big Don
(Big Don, big Don)
Big bad Don (big Don)
And with a mighty curse he found his chauffeur
Then he cried out “but I got bone spurs.”
And twenty men scrambled from a would-be grave
Now there’s only one left down there to save, big Don
With severance and dark money, they left him alone.
Then came that rumble way down in the ground
And then smoke and gas belched out of that mine
Everybody knew it was the end of the line for big Don
(Big Don, big Don)
Big bad Don (big Don)
Now, they never reopened that worthless pit
They just placed a gilded stand in front of it
These few words are written on that stand
At the bottom of this mine lies a big, flim flam man
Big Don
(Big Don, big Don)
Big bad Don (big Don)
(Big Don) big bad Don
Goodbye Don Big Don..Good bye Don…eeèhawww